Exercises by Louise Hay
At first when you do your mirror work, you may feel silly or stupid repeating the affirmations. You may even be angry or want to cry. That’s all right—in fact, it’s quite normal. And you’re not alone. Remember that I’m right here with you. I’ve been through this, too. And tomorrow is a new day.
If we do mirror work to create good in our lives but there’s a part of us that doesn’t believe we are worth it, we are not going to believe the words we are saying as we look in the mirror. We will reach a point at which we start thinking, Mirror work doesn’t work.
The truth is, the perception that mirror work doesn’t work has nothing to do with the mirror work itself or the affirmations we say. The problem is that we don’t believe we deserve all the good that life has to offer.
If that’s your belief, then affirm: I am open and receptive.
When you find it difficult to tell yourself I love you, it is most likely because you are judging yourself, repeating those old, negative messages. Don’t add to your discomfort by judging yourself for making judgments. Just relax and commit to saying the affirmation. Remember: you are committing to an affirmation that’s true. The truth is, we do love ourselves, when we are not judging ourselves.
Life is very simple. What we give out, we get back. In your journal, write down your responses to the following questions:
As you answer these questions, notice the emotions you are feeling. Write them down in your journal.
Sometimes we refuse to put any effort into creating a good life for ourselves because we believe that we don’t deserve it. The belief that we don’t deserve it may come from our early-childhood experiences. We might be buying into someone else’s concept or opinion that has nothing to do with our own reality.
Deserving has nothing to do with being good. It is our unwillingness to receive the good in life that gets in the way. Allow yourself to accept the good, whether you think you deserve it or not.
Most of us have foolish ideas about who we are and many rigid rules about how life should be lived. Let’s remove the word should from our vocabulary forever. Should is a word that makes prisoners of us. Every time we use should, we are making ourselves wrong or someone else wrong. We are, in effect, saying: not good enough.
What can be dropped now from your should list? Replace the word should with the word could. Could lets you know that you have a choice, and choice is freedom. We need to be aware that everything we do in life is done by choice. There is really nothing we have to do. We always have a choice.
We create habits and patterns because they serve us in some way. It is amazing how many illnesses we create because we want to punish a parent. We may not be doing this consciously—in fact, in most cases it is not conscious. But when we start looking within, we find the pattern. We often create negativity because we do not know how to handle some area of life. If that’s the case, ask yourself: What am I feeling sorry about? Who am I angry at? What am I trying to avoid? How do I think this will this save me?
If you are not ready to let something go—you really want to hold on to it because it serves you—it doesn’t matter what you do; you will not be able to let it go. However, when you are ready to let something go, it is amazing how easy it is to release it.
This is an exercise I have given to hundreds and hundreds of people over the years. The results are absolutely phenomenal when people stick with it. Remember: mirror work doesn’t work in theory; it only works in practice. If you do it, it really will make a difference.
If any negative thoughts come up—such as How can I approve of myself when I am fat?, or It’s silly to think that I can think this way, or I am no good—don’t resist them, don’t fight them, don’t judge them. Let them just be there. Stay focused on what you really want to experience, which is to love and approve of yourself. You can gently let go of other thoughts that intrude and stay focused on I love myself and approve of myself.
What we are doing in mirror work is trying to get back to the heart of who we really are. We want to experience who we are when we are not judging ourselves.
Can you imagine how wonderful it would be if you could live your life without ever being criticized by anyone? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to feel totally at ease, totally comfortable? You would get up in the morning and know you were going to have a wonderful day, because everybody would love you and nobody would put you down. You would feel just great.
You know what? You can give this to yourself. You can make the experience of living with yourself the most wonderful experience imaginable. You can wake up in the morning and feel the joy of spending another day with you.
We all have areas of our lives that we think are unacceptable and unlovable. If we are really angry with parts of ourselves, we often engage in self-abuse. We abuse alcohol, drugs, or cigarettes. We overeat. We beat ourselves up emotionally. One of the worst things we do, which causes more damage than anything else, is criticize ourselves. We need to stop all criticism. Once we get into the habit of not criticizing ourselves, it is amazing how we stop criticizing other people. We realize that everyone is a reflection of us, and what we see in another person we can see in ourselves.
When we complain about someone, we are really complaining about ourselves. When we can truly love and accept who we are, there is nothing to complain about. We cannot hurt ourselves, and we cannot hurt another person. Let’s make a vow that we will no longer criticize ourselves for anything.
We have been going through doors since the moment we were born. That was a big door and a big change, and we have been through many doors since then.
We came to this lifetime equipped with everything we need in order to live fully and richly. We have all the wisdom and knowledge we need. We have all the abilities and talents we need. We have all the love we need. Life is here to support us and take care of us. We need to know and trust that this is so.
Doors are constantly closing and opening, and if we stay centered in ourselves, then we will always be safe, no matter which doorway we pass through. Even when we pass through the last doorway on this planet, it is not the end. It is simply the beginning of another new adventure. Trust that it is all right to experience change.
Today is a new day. We will have many wonderful new experiences. We are loved. We are safe.
Take care of your inner child. It is the child who is frightened. It is the child who is hurting. It is the child who does not know what to do.
Be there for your child. Embrace it and love it and do whatever you can to take care of its needs. Be sure to let your child know that no matter what happens, you will always be there for it. You will never turn away or desert it. You will always love this child.
You are willing to learn new things because you do not know it all. You are willing to drop old concepts when they no longer work for you. You are willing to see your behavior and say, “I don’t want to do that anymore.” You know you can become more of who you are. Not become a better person— that would imply that you are not good enough, which isn’t true—but more of who you really are.
Growing and changing is exciting, even if you have to look at some painful things within yourself in order to do so.
Make changes one step at a time. As the Chinese philosopher Lao-tzu said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” One small step added to another can create significant change in your life. Pain does not necessarily disappear overnight, though it may. It has taken time for pain to surface; therefore it may take some time to recognize that it is no longer needed. Be gentle with yourself.
The body, like everything else in life, is a mirror of your inner thoughts and beliefs. Every cell responds to every single thought you think and every word you speak.
In this world of change, you choose to be flexible in all areas. You are willing to change yourself and your beliefs to improve the quality of your life and your world. Your body loves you in spite of how you may treat it. Your body communicates with you, and you now listen to its messages. You are willing to get the message.
You pay attention and make the necessary corrections. You love your body and give it what it needs on every level to bring it back to optimal health. You call upon an inner strength that is yours whenever you need it.
Life is very simple. We create our experiences by our patterns of thought and feeling. What we believe about ourselves and about life becomes true for us. Thoughts are only words strung together. They have no meaning whatsoever. It is we who give meaning to them. We give meaning to them by focusing on the negative messages over and over in our minds.
What we do with our feelings is very important. Are we going to act them out? Will we punish others? Sadness, loneliness, guilt, anger, and fear are all normal emotions. But when these feelings take over and become predominant, life can be an emotional battlefield.
Through mirror work, self-love, and positive affirmations, you can nourish yourself and relieve any of the anxiety you may be feeling at the moment. Do you believe you deserve peace and serenity in your emotional life?
Let’s affirm: I release the pattern in my consciousness that is creating resistance to my good. I deserve to feel good.
Remember: when a fearful thought comes up, it is just trying to protect you. Tell the fear, “I appreciate that you want to help me.” Follow that with an affirmation to address that particular fear. Acknowledge and thank the fear, but don’t give it power or importance.
You are standing in the corridor of life, and behind you many doors have closed. The doors represent things you no longer do or say or think, experiences you no longer have. Ahead of you is an unending corridor of doors, each one opening to a new experience.
As you move forward, see yourself opening doors on wonderful experiences you would like to have. See yourself opening doors to joy, peace, healing, prosperity, and love. Doors to understanding, compassion, and forgiveness. Doors to freedom. Doors to self-worth and self-esteem. Doors to self-love. It is all here before you. Which door will you open first?
Trust that your inner guide is leading you in the ways that are best for you and that your spiritual growth is continuously expanding. No matter which door opens or which door closes, you are always safe.
Choose to eliminate from your mind and your life every negative, destructive, fearful idea and thought. No longer listen to or become part of detrimental thoughts or conversations. Today no one can harm you because you refuse to believe in being hurt. You refuse to indulge in damaging emotions, no matter how justified they may seem to be. You rise above anything that attempts to make you angry or afraid. Destructive thoughts have no power over you.
You think and say only what you want to create in your life. You are more than adequate for all you need to do. You are one with the Power that created you. You are safe. All is well in your world.
I believe you receive the most benefit from forgiveness work when you do it in front of a mirror. I suggest finding a mirror you can sit in front of comfortably. I like to use the long mirror on the back of my bedroom door. Give yourself time to do this exercise. And you will probably want to repeat it often. Most of us have a lot of people to forgive.
This may be a day when you can forgive several people. It may be a day when you can forgive only one. It doesn’t matter. However you do this exercise is the right way for you. The universe and forgiveness see your showing up. At times forgiveness is like peeling away the layers of an onion. If there are too many layers, put the onion away for a day or so. You can always come back and peel another layer. Acknowledge yourself for even being willing to do this exercise. You are healing.
I am one with life, and life loves me and supports me. Therefore, I claim for myself an open heart filled with love. We are all doing the best we can at any given moment, and this is also true for me. The past is over and done. I am not my parents or their patterns of resentment. I am my own unique self, and I choose to open my heart and allow love, compassion, and understanding to flush out all memories of past pain. I am free to be all that I can be. This is the truth of my being, and I accept it as so. All is well in my life.
Envelop your family in a circle of love, whether family members are living or not. Broaden the circle to include your friends, your loved ones, your co-workers, everyone from your past, and all the people you would like to forgive but don’t know how. Affirm that you have wonderful, harmonious relationships with them all, with respect and caring on both sides.
Know that you can live with dignity and peace and joy. Let this circle of love envelop the entire planet, and let your heart open so that you have space within you for unconditional love.
What does the totality of possibilities mean to you? Think of it as going beyond all limitations. Let your mind go beyond thoughts like It can’t be done. It won’t work. There’s not enough time. There are too many obstacles.
Think of how often you have expressed these limitations: Because I’m a woman, I can’t do this. Because I’m a man, I can’t do that. I don’t have what it takes. You hold on to limitations because they are important to you. But limitations stop you from expressing and experiencing the totality of possibilities. Every time you think I can’t, you are limiting yourself. Are you willing to go beyond what you believe today?
I know that I am one with all life. I am surrounded by and permeated with Infinite Wisdom. Therefore, I rely totally on the Universe to support me in every positive way. Everything I could possibly need is already here waiting for me. This planet has more food on it than I could possibly eat. There is more money than I could ever spend. There are more people than I could ever meet. There is more love than I could possibly experience. There is more joy than I can even imagine. This world has everything I need and desire. It is all mine to use and to have.
The One Infinite Mind, the One Infinite Intelligence, always says yes to me. No matter what I choose to believe or think or say, the Universe always says yes. I do not waste my time on negative thinking or negative subjects. I choose to see myself and life in the most positive ways.
I say Yes! to opportunity and prosperity. I say Yes! to all good. I am a Yes! person living in a Yes! world, being responded to by a Yes! Universe, and I rejoice that this is so.
I am grateful to be one with Universal Wisdom and backed by Universal Power.
Deep at the center of my being, there is an infinite well of gratitude. I now allow this gratitude to fill my heart, my body, my mind, my consciousness, my very being. This gratitude radiates out from me in all directions, touching everything in my world, and returns to me as more to be grateful for. The more gratitude I feel, the more aware I am that the supply is endless.
Appreciation and acceptance act like powerful magnets for miracles every moment of the day. Compliments are gifts of prosperity. I have learned to accept them graciously. If somebody compliments me, I smile and say, “Thank you.”
Today is a sacred gift from life. I open my arms wide to receive the full measure of prosperity that the Universe offers. Any time of the day or night, I can let it in.
The Universe supports me in every way possible. I live in a loving, abundant, harmonious Universe, and I am grateful. There are times in life, however, when the Universe gives to me but I am not in a position to do anything about giving back. I can think of many people who helped me enormously at times when there was no way I could ever repay them. Later, however, I was able to help others, and that’s the way life goes. I relax and rejoice in the abundance and gratitude that are here now.
It is vitally important to keep the lines of communication open with children, especially during the teen years. So often children are told things like Don’t say that. Don’t do that. Don’t feel that. Don’t be that way. Don’t express that. When all they hear is don’t, don’t, don’t, they stop communicating.
Then, when the children are older, parents complain, “My children never call me.” Why don’t they call? Because the lines of communication have been cut, that’s why.
When you are open with your children—using positive statements like “It’s okay to feel sad” and “You can talk to me about it”—and you encourage them to share their feelings, the lines of communication will be restored.
Remember: you are part of a community of people all over the globe who are working to make this a better world. We have come together at this time because there is something we need to learn from one another. It is safe for us to work on loving ourselves so that we may benefit and grow from this experience. We choose to work together to create harmony in our relationships and in every area of our lives.
Divine right action is guiding us every moment of the day. We say the right words at the right time and follow the right course of action at all times. Each person is part of the harmonious whole.
There is a divine blending of energies as we work joyfully together, supporting and encouraging one another in ways that are fulfilling and productive. We are healthy, happy, loving, joyful, respectful, supportive, and at peace with ourselves and with one another. So be it, and so it is.